You get home late from work, feeling tired and chances are the last thing on your mind is getting intimate with your partner. Before long this can become a pattern of behavior and the next thing you know, you find that the passion has gone from your relationship or marriage. It is all too easy to slip into routines that end up letting you drift apart from your love, even leading to infidelity as one or other partner seeks to find some spark elsewhere.
So how do you stop this happening and rebuild the passion in your relationship?
- Emotions First!
You can’t be intimate and rediscover the passion if you are still upset about the washing up not being done, so the first thing to do is reconnect emotionally. You need to start communicating your feelings to each other in a non-judgmental open way. Don’t cast blame or start pointing fingers, but instead let your thoughts come from a place of love and work together to solve issues. Being kind, generous and compassionate will help with this, as well as beginning to build back the bond between you.
Get rid of the resentment and start working together again.
Make sure you give each other the time to get ready for love. If your partner has just got in from a stressful day at work or spent the day looking after the kids, they may not feel like having sex. However, there is nothing wrong with planning. A lot of times people talk about spontaneity as if it is the be-all and end-all of passionate relationships, but actually, a little planning and anticipation for a special evening can help fan the flames!
- Frequent Flirting
There is a theory that says when you spend time with a lover you are in a constant state of foreplay, even when you are not actually having sex. This is a good way to think about your interaction with your partner. Flirting with each other, being kind, offering genuine compliments, and even a gentle touch now and again can all help improve your relationship and your sexual connection. Rather than taking each other for granted, each other opportunity to have some flirtatious fun!
- Take Some Time To Connect
While you may be thinking of the main course, take some time to enjoy your time with each other by doing something that connects and relaxes you, like a massage. Sensual touching and focusing on each-other can help rebuild your connection and strengthen the bonds between you. Don’t expect it to lead to sex and just enjoy the moment for what it is (although it might be a bonus if things naturally move further!).
- Love Yourself
It is hard to accept being loved by someone else if you are not comfortable in your own skin first. Enjoy your own body and what it feels like to move with it, be confident about yourself and you will find it easier to be with your partner too!